I should have known it wouldn't work out especially when I was doubting the things I said and when I kept considering leaving.
I was afraid that no one could possibly love me more and I hated change. So I let myself live in denial and get carried away by the cheapest interpretations of words and things and let my mind wander to the point I was probably trying to interpret only the positive. So I got tired, really tired because it wasn't how I wanted it anyway and I hated it so badly.
Now that's said, I feel pretty alright to be correct.