Wednesday, July 18, 2012

let us veg

My hormones are fucking messing with me and i'm so tired trying to figure out what's potentially wrong and fix it from there. I hate fixing things and then once i'm done, something else has to be fixed. I'm lazy, oh yes perhaps I am. Have I mentioned how I Hate thinking, liking musings takes more out of me than a 6km run. I find myself drifting into thought so often that I get so frustrated from the hurt. I let my imaginations and thoughts be what makes me and what empties me. Maybe for a day I could be a vegetable and just grow without having to think.
Like the great depression, i'm suffering from the plague. The plague of stupid, over thinking (I hope) of worries and thoughts.
Yes, hurt is hurt, hurt stings, hurt stays until you shove it the middle finger and immerse yourself in what's worth staying and being happy from. But how the hell do I get away from it if it still sinks me. I think it's the hormones, it better be. (got to find seratonin). Oh god. I'm gonna make a nice lunch now since I have one more person at home to make cooking worth while: my dad.

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